Dealing with insecurities and building self-confidence

Everyone has insecurities however confident they may seem, and insecurities are a normal part of life. However, insecurities can also have incredibly negative effects on our mental and physical health, and just generally make us feel a bit rubbish. Dealing with insecurities is a constant battle as you age and mature and there are always good and bad days – this is completely normal. Nobody expects you to be 100% all the time, in fact, it is probably far more unhealthy to strive for these unrealistic expectations of perfection for yourself. There are ways to tackle your insecurities and build your self-confidence which we will be discussing in today’s blog post.

The first thing and the most important thing is to acknowledge your insecurities and accept that having insecurities are normal. Living in denial is much worse, as by acknowledging that they are there and normal to have is the only way you can begin to tackle them. The next part is the hardest - tackling those negative thoughts within yourself and actively filtering out all the negativity around you. Society feeds us this image of the ideal life and the ideal person, fuelled by celebrities and social media, and when we are taught that this impossible standard is what to aim for, how can we not feel insecure? Keeping everything in perspective is so important - most things on social media are fake, staged or both, and only represent the best of these people’s lives, not how they are on a day-to-day basis. It is important to keep this in mind when on the internet as it is very easy to fall into the trap of doom-scrolling which is going to inevitably be bad for your mental health.

Tackling negativity within yourself as well as around yourself is equally as important. It is incredibly common to be self-critical to a damaging extent and simply negative about yourself and your life. Some exercises that can help is changing your vocabulary about yourself - words have power. When you think about yourself in a negative way, change it to something positive about yourself. Things like positive affirmations, journaling and meditation all help to keep you grounded and keep positive. Even something as simple as saying something positive about yourself every morning can make such a massive difference quickly, even if you don’t necessarily fully believe it yet.

The best tip I have ever received on how to build self confidence is to ‘fake it till you make it’. Similar to the idea of affirmations, the more you make yourself believe something, the more it will be true. Faking confidence will change how others perceive you and how you perceive yourself, even if you really are quaking in your boots. Wear that slightly risky outfit that makes you feel great, or do that thing that you were nervous about and do it confidently and see the difference. Even if you do not feel confident straight away, it is much better to live life to its fullest instead of giving in to insecurities.

Insecurities and self confidence is a constant battle where all the cards are usually stacked against you, and you will have good days and bad days. The most important thing is to simply keep going, take each day at a time and try even when it's hard. One of the best things to do if you are feeling overwhelmed is talk to someone. Even a chat with a friend can help ease the burden, and if you feel like you need it, don’t be scared to reach out for professional help. I have said it many times before and will say it many times in the future, but reaching out and asking for help is a sign of strength, not weakness.

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Men’s mental health week- tackling gender norms